Monday, September 22, 2008

New Medications for Women Only!

Hi Gang,
Today we have a list of new medications for women only. Hope this helps the gals.
Bromo in Chicken Country calling the HOGS with a blonde 'thingy' before we see the list.
She was Sooooooooooooo Blonde......She thought if she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless.

New Medications For Women Only

DAMNITOL, Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 hours.
ST. MOMMA'S WORT, Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to six hours.
EMPTYNESTROGEN, Highly effective suppository that eliminates melancholy by enhancing the memory of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out.
PEPTOBIMBO, Liquid silicone for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and improves flirting.
DUMBEROL, When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ, resulting in enjoyment of country western music.
FLIPITOR, Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.
PENISCILLIN, Potent antiboyotic for older women. Increases resistance to such lines as,"You make me want to be a better person ... can we get naked now?"
BUYAGRA, Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency and duration of spending spree. Extra Strength BUY-ONE-AL, When combined with Buyagra, can cause an indiscriminate buying frenzy so severe the victim may even come home with a Donnie Osmond CD or a book by Dr. Laura.
JACKASSPIRIN, Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary or phone number.
ANTI-TALKSIDENT, A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers.
SEXCEDRIN, More effective than Excedrin in creating the, "Not now, dear, I have a headache" syndrome.

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